Saturday, July 3, 2010

Prepare to Repel Boarders

So far, cruising the Trent-Severn has been peaceful. Lakefront cottages.  Tracts of forest.  

But, trouble loomed.  As we approached the lock at Bolsover, we spotted a Viking.  

Well, actually it was a guy, paddling a yellow plastic kayak, wearing a Viking helmet--the kind with large plastic horns.  "Prepare to repel boarders!"  we yelled.

Little did we know the peril we faced.  The Viking turned out to be harmless, but the crew was about to be kidnapped by pirates. We happened to glance behind and saw that we were being stormed by six pirate ships, each one flying the skull and crossbones, each one with a frightening pirate captain at the helm, and each with a crew of alluring pirate wenches.

They forced their way into the lock and proceeded to terrify the lockkeepers--and the boaters tied up in the lock--with the loud volume of their stereo system, blasting Mustang Sally while the wenches gyrated on the bow, waving their hot-pink bow ropes.

It was the Pirates of the Trent!

Each year, this group of friends dresses up in full pirate regalia and cruises the Trent-Severn, blasting Elvis on the stereo system, chasing little children with plastic swords, and threatening to keelhaul errant journalists who (look closely in photo above) manage to keep their micro-recorders rolling to document the experience.

No comments:

Post a Comment